Leaving Her
by lil-hermione-at-heart
Summary: Listen to Dear God by Avenged Sevenfold Harry is off to fight Voldemort; only he left his best friends behind. But how will he feel about this decision when Hermione admits she has something to confess.


**Chapter One**

Deep in the dark Forest of Dean sat a little tent with a small ray of light peeking through a crack in the fabric opening. Inside sat a teenage boy, but he might as well have been a grown man by now thanks to the life he had lived.

Harry Potter sat on the edge of the bench in the center of the tent he had snitched from Hermione. He sighed as she sprang up in his thoughts again. He had been having a hard time keeping her out of his head ever since he had left; and rightfully so.

Harry had left the Burrow only a week ago now, and ever since then he had slowly started to regret his decision to leave Ron and Hermione behind.

Another tear welled up in his eye as that night replayed like a movie in his mind.

_Harry was up in Ron's room at the top of the Burrow, gathering his things and shoving them unceremoniously into his sack as everyone else was downstairs working on decorations for the wedding. When he came upon the small piece of broken mirror he paused, sitting on the edge of his cot and looking into to the reflective surface. This time, the mirror remained blank._

_ Suddenly, there was a knocking at the door followed by, "Harry, it's me" in Hermione's sweet, momentarily quiet voice. Panic flooded him as he shoved his bag off the bed onto the floor on the other side._

_ After he was sure it was out of view, he said as calmly as he could "come in". Hermione slipped into the room and closed the door behind her. There was something about the expression etched on her face that made Harry worry. _

_ "Hermione, is everything alright?" he asked gently._

_ She shot him a quick glance with her soft chocolate orbs then quickly returned her gaze to the floor. She shifted her stance, rocking between her two feet, as her arms wrapped around herself as if trying to give herself some comfort._

_ Harry stood up and walked over to her, putting his hands on either side of her face, making her look up at him. "What's wrong?"_

_ "I um…" she looked back to the ground, causing Harry to drop his hands. Instead he put his hand on her back and guided her over the edge of the bed, motioning for her to sit down next to him._

_ "Talk to me," he said._

_ She shirted again until she was sitting cross-legged on the bed facing him. "Well you know the wedding is in two days and everyone is so wrapped up in getting ready, talking about how in love Bill and Fleur are, and just oozing with all this mushiness. Well, it kind of started to make me jealous. Everyone has someone, except me."_

_ "Hermione, you know that's not true. I don't have anyone. Just because Ron started dating Luna and Ginny got back together with Dean doesn't mean you're being left out of the love game. I'm right here with you!" Harry smiled at her, wrapping one of her smaller hands in his big ones._

_ She looked down at their entwined fingers and lifted her other hand to fumble with his fingers, rubbing the rough spots and callouses from playing Quidditch. "Well, either way, it made me start thinking that it's high time I find a love of my own. All these years I've been helping you with all the girls that wanted to go after you because they thought you were the Chosen One. Yes, I know, you are the Chosen One," Hermione said, stopping Harry from interrupting her. "And then there was Ronald who got himself all wrapped up with Lavender which made me sick to my stomach because I thought that I had feelings for him. But, as it turns out, I think I just liked him because I thought that the one I really did like would never like me back." Her eyes quickly flashed up to meet Harry's, which were filled with confusion._

_ "I was worried he'd never like me because I'd always been his closest friend and best mate, practically a sister. I didn't want to take the chance of ruining the relationship we had by taking the risk of telling him how I feel. But I've changed my mind. I want him to know." She paused for a second, taking a deep breathe. "I want you to know."_

_ She finally lifted her head all the way and meet Harry's gaze with her own. She place the hand Harry wasn't hold on the side of his face and, slowly leaning forward, she placed a small and gentle kiss on Harry's lips._

Harry let more tears fall down his face as he remembered the feeling of Hermione's lips on his own, the feel of her soft hand on his face. After she had let him sit in silence for a minute to wrap his head around what she had just said in done, Harry met her gaze again to see Hermione raise an eyebrow at him. At that look, he had placed his hands on her face and kissed her with as much passion as he could muster.

But, even though he and Hermione had finally confessed how much they liked each other, Harry didn't let it change his plans to leave that night; thought he desperately wanted to stay. He knew she would be heartbroken in the morning, and he didn't like that one bit, but it was a risk he was going to have to accept. If he ever wanted to have a real relationship with her, he needed to end this first.

But now, sitting here in this tent in the middle of nowhere, he desperately wished he had brought her with him.

A few days later, he was pacing the length of the tent, his head brushing the top as he neared to edges. It seemed that no matter how much he tried to focus on the task he had in front of him, he couldn't get her off his mind.

Forcing himself to think about what he needed to do, he walked over to the table to look at the notes he had scribbled together in an attempt to make some order of his thoughts so he could find the remaining horcrux. He had found the real locket yesterday but was still at a loss for how to destroy it. He was also fairly certain the remaining three were in Hogwarts, but he was no closer to actually finding them than he was to figuring out how to destroy the one he currently had.

As he got up to begin pacing again, he felt like his life was nothing but an empty road that led to one place; killing Voldemort. Nothing else in his life had ever gotten to actually be important. While Dumbledore was alive, he never let Harry focus on much else. But now he had Hermione; and he wanted her to be important in his life. Yet here he was, still in this blasted tent, alone.

As his mind returned to her, he thought of all the times he'd spent with her: third year trying to save Sirius, fourth year preparing for the tasks, fifth year organizing the DA, and sixth year while he tried to hold both of them together when she was distraught by Ron. At the thought of his final year at Hogwarts, he pulled a picture out of his pocket that he kept on him at all times. It was a picture that had been taken of him and Hermione laughing together on a trip to Hogsmeade when Ron had ditched them to go make-out with Lavender somewhere. They were sitting in the Three Broomsticks laughing at Harry's attempt to cheer up a still sad Hermione. It made him smile again every time he looked at it.

But as he returned the picture to his pocket, the smile slipped off his face as a tear rolled down his cheek. He quickly wiped it off with the back of his hand, sitting down at the table, trying to focus his mind. _"Hermione would have figured this out already," _he thought to himself.

Giving in to the pain that swept through his mind at the thought of here again, he let his head fall into his hands and he wept. All the while praying that wherever she was, she was safe and not alone.

And as he hoped for this, he cursed himself for leaving her. He practically yelled in anger for leaving her behind right when they had finally admitted to loving each other.

"Why?" he yelled out to no one. "Why has it always have to be me? Can't I just for once in my life have something that means more to me than anything? Is that so much to ask?"

He stormed around the tent throwing the small chairs, kicking the table and the legs of his cot until he collapsed onto it in another fit of tears. "Why?" he whispered as he drifted into a light sleep.

He awoke the next morning to the rustling off leaves outside the tent. Senses immediately alert, he quietly got up from the bed and crept to the little opening at the front of the tent, wand in hand. But as he sprang from the tent ready to face the intruder, he was faced with nothing but the wind blowing in his face, throwing leaves around his feet. Harry sulked back into the tent, thinking he's too tired to be doing this anymore. After 7 years of pursuing the same thing, he was ready to be done.

It was then, sitting on the edge of his cot with his head in his hands, that Harry Potter decided that for once, he was going to do what he wanted to do; not what needed to be done. Besides, what was one day going to hurt?

Harry reappeared on a small side street of Hogsmeade, ransack over his shoulder. If his memory served him correctly, it would be a Hogsmeade trip weekend for the students. Donning his glamour charm, he made his way down the main street, looking through every shop window for a girl with bushy hair.

When he walked past the Three Broomsticks, he took an extra minute to look, thinking that'd be the most likely place she'd be. As he spotted a table with two redheads and one very peculiar looking blonde, he thought he'd found her. But when he continued searching, he noticed it was just Ron, Ginny, and Luna. While the sight of them did make him want to duck in, even just to see them a little longer, he knew he was already short on time and he hadn't even found her yet.

As he continued up the street the shops got fewer and far between. Finally it was just a narrow lane with trees on both sides. Thinking it was his last hope, he headed towards the shrieking shack.

As the street began to widen and the trees seemed to open like grand double doors, Harry took a few small steps to the side, following the tree line. As he rounded the turning corner of the trees, the small clearing stretched out in front of him. A memory flashed before his eyes of their third year. Harry had snuck to Hogsmeade under his invisibility cloak to find Hermione and Ron here talking about the shack when Draco had arrived and started making fun of them. Harry smiled at the memory of the freaked out look of Malfoy's face when snowballs from nowhere started flying towards him.

As Harry smiled but shook the memory from his mind, his eyes wandered the clearing until he stopped a lone figure sitting on a bolder staring off into the distance. He smiled broader when he recognized the wavy hair. Slowly making his way over to her, he tried to be as quite as possible. Apparently that wasn't a good idea.

Suddenly, Hermione whipped around, wand out pointed straight at his face. "Back off!" she yelled at her supposed attacker.

Harry jumped. "Wait, Hermione, it' just me!" he said, raising his hands to defend himself.

Hermione looked confused. "What do you mean, 'it's me'? I don't know you!"

Harry had forgotten about the glamour charm. "Oh, wait. Hold on." He started reaching for his wand but Hermione stopped him.

She stuck her wand so close to his face that the tip of it brushed his nose. "Don't even think about it."

"Hermione, I promise I'm not doing anything. I'm just getting my wand to remove the glamour charm." But before he could reach any further, she muttered the countercurse and Harry could feel the glamour slowly slipping away.

He could tell he was back to normal when Hermione's wand faltered and tears began to form in her eyes. "Harry?"

"It's me." He let himself smile as she droppe her wand arm and jumped into his arms. He barried his face in her hair, inhaling her scent of lavender and vanilla. But it was too soon when she pulled herself away from him.

"Wait, what are you doing here? I thought you were out looking for the horcruxes!" she said, wiping away the tears that were rolling from his eyes now.

"I was. Well, I am. I've got one and I think I know where the last three are, but I still don't know how to destroy them." Before he could get any more out, Hermione interrupted him.

"The sword of Gryffindor," she said. "You're not the only one who's been working on this." She smiled. "The only down side is that it's missing."

Harry groaned. Just another thing he was going to have to find. "Well, I'll just add it to the list."

Hermione took a step forward and grasped both of his hands with hers as a frown marred her face as she met his gaze. "How long are you staying?"

"Not long, I actually should be going." Harry looked away, not wanting to see her expression.

"Oh."

He looked back when he heard a sniffle to see more tears pouring down her face. He lifted his hands and put them on both sides of her face, wiping the tears away with his thumbs. "Hey, don't worry. I won't be long." Those were the only words he could think to say, even though he didn't know how accurate they were.

Hermione leaned forward and placed her lips on his, kissing him with all the feeling she'd been holding in since he left. When they finally broke apart, Harry leaned his forehead on hers. "I should go."

Hermione let one more tear slide down her cheek as she nodded. Harry pulled her close to him one last time, hugging her so tightly that he was slightly worried he was going to hurt her. But as he let go, he said, "As much as I hate to ask this of you, you can't tell anyone you saw me here. Not even Ron or Ginny or Luna."

Hermione nodded her understanding. Harry gave her a lingering kiss on the cheek, then as he pulled away he whispered, "I love you."

Harry took a step back and, with a final look into her eyes, turned and started heading towards the tree.

"Harry!" Hermione yelled.

He turned around to face her.

"I love you too," she said with a smile even though more tears began to fall down her gorgeous face.

Harry smiled, took a few more steps into the trees, and disappeared.


End file.
